The new DCFS ‘Intelligence’ map.
A recent survey carried out by the DCFS (The Department of Cockups, Fudging & Sludge) has proven beyond a shadow of a doubt what many North Devon Locals has suspected for generations. Barry Trotter reports:
Namely that there is a measurable North South divide across the county with the North winning hands down when it comes to usable braincells. Nothing highlights the issue more so than this weeks news that Torbay Council after nearly 30 years have finally decided to allow cinemas within the borough to show Monty Pythons ‘Life Of Brian’ which was banned on it’s original release way back in 1979. More here.
Whereas Little Bideford residents have been able to see re-runs of it at the Scott Cinema in Old Flatulence Street for ages. Evidence collected over a three month period to back up the findings of the DCFS survey weighed in at over 18,000 pages & had to be delivered to their offices in 15 taxi’s & a Covent Garden based Tuk Tuk. Well known ‘Eater Of The Pies’ Porridge District Councillor Morris Major was quoted as saying “Dunt take no bliddy scientiss to tell ee wot uss as knowed all along do it? They poor b*st*rd* down Torbay way ain’t had the pleasure of laffin themselves sick to that Monty Python nonsense av um. If ee wanted proof then luk no futhur than that mi dear”. It would appear that Mr Majors feeling struck a chord with many. Porridgeside residents, Mrs Edna Edworthy of Upper Lower Baxmanworthy Farm added “Daft beggers”.
